The Clarence Chronicles
Sometimes I think the greatest testament to my love for my wife is the fact that we are still married after 33 years of dealing with her faovrite unlce, Clarence. I ahve never been able to figure out if Uncle Clarence is charming in an annoying sort of way, or announing in a charming sort of way. Uncle Clarence is a life-long bachelor who happens to own 3 businesses in our town: the Dairy Queen; Clarence's Used Car Emporium (he really likes the word "emproium"), and the Sudds Your Dudds laundromat. He is quite the entrepreneuer, and quite the local celebrity, of sorts.
What Uncle Clarence really knows is marketing. Every one of his businesses is successful. And Uncle Clarence is just the type of guy to let you know exactly how successful. He likes nothing better than to expound upon his marketing insights that have made him what he is today (at least the successful businessman part).
For 33 years I've listened to his "What I think you should know" talks, but only recently have I developed a the ability to sift through all the "Uncle Clarence" and find some real gems in what he has to say. I have written some of his better "lessons" down and listed them below. I am sure I will add to this list as long as Uncle Clarence continues to treat our farmily to pizza night at the diner.